Interview with Neal Engstrom - Cover Story October 2025

Neal, for those meeting you for the first time, could you share a little about yourself and your journey so far?

Sure! I grew up at the ocean in beautiful La Jolla, California. We did everything at the beach –surfing, spearfishing, running, bonfires, … And then I headed off to the east coast in 1984 to go to college at Harvard. I also had an opportunity to study abroad in Australia, fly planes as a flight instructor and skydive jump pilot, work for Hitachi in Japan, and earn an MBA at Stanford. I now live in Los Angeles and run a real estate investment fund focused on hotel and commercial properties. My wife, Giselle, and I have two kids in college and one finishing up high school this year. I recently wrote YOUR LIFEPATH, which is intended to be a guide to living a fulfilling life for new adults, their parents, and anyone feeling stuck.

You’ve lived in California, Cambridge, Tokyo, and Sydney—how have these different environments shaped your worldview and approach to life?

Living in Cambridge, MA–surrounded by all those wonderful historic brick buildings and landmarks—made me think a lot about all the greats that came before us, (and it was a big eye-opener living in a city where it snows!)

Living in Sydney—doing study abroad as a college junior—instilled a love of shoestring budget travel in me. I took in a lot of Australia by bus, and ventured up to Indonesia to surf.

And living in Tokyo—where I worked as a salaryman for Hitachi and was expected to do everything in Japanese and abide by all the same customs as the other first year employees—showed me a way of life in which there’s a much deeper respect for tradition and one’s elders, and an ingrained pride in being part of the group.

Many people know you as a real estate investor and fund manager. What inspired you to write YOUR LIFEPATH and share your life philosophy?

In my twenties I read many biographies and was captivated by the adventures of Errol Flynn prospecting for gold in New Guinea, and of Howard Hughes who amassed an aviation and motion picture and casino empire. I had difficulty at first reconciling how I could admire two people doing such different things.

While I was doing some flying in Alaska after business school, I remember it all coming to me in a “eureka moment”—I realized that the two men were in different stages of their lives. Flynn was in the Adventure stage of life, and Hughes was in the Mission stage. Meanwhile, self-help books and other sources of guidance seemed to typically offer the same guidance to everyone, regardless of whether they were 25 years old or 35, or 45, or 85, and regardless of what life stage they were in.

It was at that point I knew I’d ultimately want to develop this worldview further—of there being life stages we go through—and write a book and share this set of insights with the world. Then, in business school at Stanford, we had to write an obituary, and in mine I talked about writing a book on these themes when I was 70—after raising kids and building a business. That’s not how it turned out, but that is what I had in my mind in my 20s!

YOUR LIFEPATH introduces five stages of life—Adventures, Mission, Family, Tribe, and Legacy. Could you briefly walk us through these stages and why they are so important?

I love stories—biographies, novels, and films—about people who had Adventures in their early adulthood, which led to self-knowledge that enabled them to identify and formulate a life Mission. I believe many of the most fulfilled people seem to be those who spent their lives carrying out a uniquely personal Mission, and then converting that Mission into a lasting Legacy they were able to leave to future generations. Historical heroes of mine like: Jacques Cousteau, Coco Chanel, Chuck Yeager, Jane Goodall, Conrad Hilton, Mother Teresa, Giorgio Armani and many others.

Additionally, during the Mission stage most people will also form a Family that provides emotional and other forms of support. And during the Mission stage many people will also form a Tribe comprised of like-minded people that help them carry out the mission on a larger scale than they could on their own.

YOUR LIFEPATH is a life guide that describes the five stages we pass through after finishing our schooling and through which we can achieve continuous self-fulfillment and also make contributions to others – Adventures, Mission, Family, Tribe, Legacy. The book is divided into 5 sections, each 40 pages long and consisting of 20 essays.

You began writing notes for your kids that became this book. At what point did you realize your message could resonate with Generation Z and beyond?

Because I became a dad relatively late in life at 38, I began saving notes—about life and the life stages—for my kids in an old humidor, which I filled to the brim. During the pandemic we had a lot of free time. So, for 100 days in a row I took a long walk in the foothills and then afterwards sat and wrote a 2-page essay. Those 100 essays became the manuscript for YOUR LIFEPATH, which is 200 pages long.

I initially thought I was writing the book for my kids, but I found that during my walk each day some force beyond me was “filling the X-mas stocking” with great material, that couldn’t be solely for them. The book, I realized, is for all of Generation Z (and their parents!) and anyone stuck within the life stages we all go through after finishing our schooling. I think these days new adults are presented with a lot of pessimistic information through traditional news sources and social media. I want to reassure today’s recent graduates that they can thrive despite these headwinds, and have fun and experience fulfillment while they do it. “You got this!”

You’ve had adventures all over the world—what’s one experience that completely changed your perspective on life?

Great question! As you know I am a huge advocate of new adults having a series of adventures that can provide important self-knowledge. So, hopefully we each can have many adventures that inform us and change our lives in various ways as they slowly reveal our calling. Yes, I have had an opportunity to travel to a lot of amazing countries, and do some exhilarating work as a pilot, but…

One adventure that is fresh in my mind because I just wrote a draft for a LIFEPATH Newsletter about it was visiting the Taj Mahal. I spent a few weeks traveling around India in 1989, and met a group of Swedes who were also new adults in their adventure phase of life. We did a weeklong camel trek in the desert, and then went to Agra to see the Taj. I’ve never seen a building like that. It was so beautiful from afar due to its incredible gleaming white dome. And up close every inch was meticulously inlaid with colorful precious stones designed to look like flowers and other nature symbols.

That striking beauty, both inside and out, helped in making me very fascinated with well designed buildings, and helped lead to me realizing my mission was to become a real estate builder, manager, and investor. And the back story about how Shah Jahan built the Taj to honor his wife who had died in childbirth also made me think a lot about eventually finding someone I could love that much. Which I eventually did—my now wife Giselle!

How did your time in Japan, working in mergers & acquisitions, shape your approach to business and personal growth?

I spent a year teaching English in Japan and was able to learn enough Japanese to be offered a job by Hitachi in Tokyo. I was expected to do all my work in Japanese and be treated just like the native-born “new face” employees from Japan’s top schools and families. Yes, it was really cool working on deals related to nuclear fuel, motors, air conditioning, and other kinds of technology.

But my biggest takeaway was the incredible pride I felt to be working for a company with the track record of excellence Hitachi has, and to be part of the group of young executives in training. We worked hard together and played hard together—on the company soccer team, tennis, skiing, etc. Sort of like in the Star Wars movies, every new hire is paired with a mentor about 5-10 years older than them, who teaches you as an apprentice the company ways and how to conduct yourself. That instilled in me a desire to want to teach and mentor people younger than me.

Writing a book is a big endeavor—what was the most challenging part of bringing YOUR LIFEPATH to life, and what was the most rewarding?

As I said, I had always thought I was going to write this book in my 70s! I just never thought I’d have the time to do it sooner. Little did I know there would be a pandemic when I was in my early 50s that would give me all the time I needed to convert the notes I’d collected into a manuscript.

I think the book writing flowed easily once I flipped the switch to “on” because I had so many detailed notes and had been thinking about these topics for a long time. But what was unexpected and very rewarding was the exercise of working with a copywriter to catch loose ends, fill holes, and keep the voice of the book consistent throughout.

I learned a lot about myself through that process that has helped me in my writing and in pretty much all facets of my life. It made me realize that I want to reassure my readers and listening audiences and be uplifting. Life has its difficult moments—those are something we all have to face from time to time—but it is very possible to make all the stages of our lives amazing and fulfilling. It isn’t supposed to be easy or comfortable all the time. Life has lots of zigs and zags, and it is within those that the best parts of our lives take place!

Balancing professional ambition with family life can be tough. How did you navigate building a career while raising three children?

Two things helped me a lot. First, I have a great spouse and business partner in my wife of 28 years Giselle. She’s super high energy and resourceful, and the glue that keeps us all going! Plus, we were among the last of our friends to have kids, and we learned from them to try to live near one set of grandparents if possible—which we did, living one town over from my Panamanian parents-in-law.

Second, I started Engstrom Realty Fund—my mission—before having kids. That is something that I talk about throughout the book. Everyone’s life is a little different, but all other things being equal, it is preferable to formulate one’s life mission and get momentum going behind it before having children, and before marrying and before having a mortgage if possible too.

Your “love language” is grilling! What’s your signature dish, and how does cooking for your family reflect your personality?

Oh, that’s easy! I like to show my love for family and friends by marinating a well-marbled ribeye for 48 hours, grilling it to perfection, and serving it with a super cold and crisp Caesar salad. (A nice glass of Bordeaux, Napa cabernet, or Australian shiraz while grilling and gorging is a necessity too!)

For readers interested in applying the LIFEPATH framework, what’s the first step they should take toward self-fulfillment?

This might not seem like a step per se, but I think it is really important—take some time, however much you need, and really convince yourself: “there’s no rush”! Everything in life is 24/7 these days, and this can put a lot of subconscious time pressure on us. When I graduated from college in 1988, in an era before the internet and smartphones, there was more of a sense of “there’s all the time in the world”—to seek one’s fortune and make a mark on the world. And, guess what, the good news is that there still is! With all the advancements in medicine and the knowledge we have now about eating healthy, exercising, etc., most people alive now can have a good expectation of living far longer than previous generations did. So, relax, I want to assure you—“You have time to fulfill yourself!”

Second determine if you are in the Adventure, Mission or Legacy stage. I have some videos on Instagram and X that can help with this. If you are in the Adventure stage, go pursue a series of adventures that can reveal your calling and Mission. If you are in the Mission stage, distill your Mission and build a tribe around it to grow it larger. And if you are in the Legacy stage, shift your thinking to how you can leave something of lasting value for future generations. Keep YOUR LIFEPATH on your nightstand, and read a few pages every day!

Looking ahead, what are your hopes for YOUR LIFEPATH, your talks, and the weekly newsletter?

First, give as many talks as possible—throughout the world—about the LIFEPATH material to get the word out. And second, write essays about remarkable inspiring individuals with Epic Adventures, Amazing Missions, Nurturing Families, Powerful Tribes, and Lasting Legacies for the free LIFEPATH Newsletter.

And through these talks and the newsletter help explain to younger generations how important it is to have Adventures after completing our schooling and lay down the groundwork of a life Mission before choosing a profession, selecting a spouse or life partner, and buying a home. Help explain to younger generations how to develop and carry out a life mission in order to achieve deep personal fulfillment and make a large contribution to the world.

Finally, where can our readers learn more about you and connect with your work online?

Readers can connect with me on Instagram (@NealEngstrom) or Linkedin, and can also find out more at https://nealengstrom.com.

Neal Engstrom is a Harvard graduate and Stanford MBA. He traveled the world and worked as a flight instructor and skydive jump pilot prior to becoming a commercial real estate professional. In 2006 he founded real estate investment firm, Engstrom Realty Fund. He and his wife of 27 years, Giselle, have raised three children and reside in Southern California.

"During the Covid pandemic, I wrote the book I would have loved to have stumbled upon during my senior year of college or received as a graduation gift. A book containing a framework for thinking about life after school, and a manual for pursuing continuous personal fulfillment."

"Over the years I had filled an old cigar humidor with observational notes scribbled on cocktail napkins and scraps of paper. For one hundred days during the Covid lockdown, I took a long walk and wrote a two-page essay based on those notes to create the book you hold in your hands."

"Our lives consist of five stages—adventures, mission, family, tribe, legacy—each building upon one another. YOUR LIFEPATH contains a framework for self-discovery, and a roadmap for achieving personal fulfillment throughout each of the life stages. Fulfillment will ultimately be accomplished by figuring out what we were born to do and spending our lives doing it." Find out more at https://nealengstrom.com.

Cover story published in The Relatable Voice Magazine - October 2025. Downolad the full magazine for free at https://www.relatable-media.com/the-relatable-voice-magazine